


Realizations

by Jena Bartley (jenab)



Category: Alias (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, Male-Female Friendship, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-01-13
Updated: 2004-01-13
Packaged: 2018-01-07 22:44:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1125279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenab/pseuds/Jena%20Bartley
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I don’t know how to be this person.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Realizations

**Author's Note:**

  * For [misbegotten](https://archiveofourown.org/users/misbegotten/gifts).



When Sydney came back from missing for two years, I ended up becoming her closest friend, her confidant and a shoulder to cry on when she needed it. Mostly through default because there was no one left she could turn to. Mike was married, one of her best friends was dead while the other one was in the Witness Protection program and everyone else had moved on with life while she was struggling just to catch up.

Now some things have changed again. The biggest being Lauren's death resulting in Mike and Sydney being together again. In fact, Mike is almost living at Sydney's place now while he deals with mess Lauren's betrayal and death have left behind.

What hasn't changed at all is I am still the person Sydney turns to when she still needs to talk or a shoulder to cry on. About her father, what happened with Mike and the struggles she and Mike are going through in getting back together again. I'm still her confidant and close friend

Except...

I don't know how to be this person. Not anymore. I'm still her friend, but now I've discovered I want more from her. I'm half in love with her, something that started when she came back. I want to be the person she loves, the one she curls up with in bed at night. I want to be more than just her friend. It's so easy to love her despite the baggage that comes with her, in the form of her family and Rambaldi and everything else that has made Sydney who she is now.

She doesn't need me as a lover or even someone else in love with her, like Sark. She already has Mike, who loves her deeply. She needs me far more as her friend, the one person who will tell her the harsh truths she needs to hear sometimes.

I don't know how to go back and be that person for her. To somehow forget the first time I realized how much I had fallen for her.


End file.
